This is Part IV of a series on the psyche and sexuality, based on the author’s research, reflections and analysis. The writer deconstructs the sexual fantasy that seems to defy all logic, and yet somehow makes sense. She also meditates on the feminist position on psychoanalysis.
When friends — or we ourselves — berate the wrong decisions we have made in love, we tend to think about the situations that psychoanalyst Bruce Fink calls the ‘pull paradigm’. The story of love has been constructed such that it has us assuming there is something about the other person that ‘pulls’ us towards them. In this ‘pull paradigm’, we assume that desirability has an important role to play in determining who we form an intimate relationship with.
This is Part II of a series on the psyche and sexuality, based on the author’s research, reflections and analysis. The series explains key psychoanalytic concepts and offers pedagogical possibilities while working on sexuality.
Yummy yuckiness is the stuff of life. Allowing the bewilderment around it to bubble up matters. Alongside recognition, the exploration of why pleasure and danger are so mixed up also matters. While sharing why I think this exploration is important, I’d like to begin with my own experiences.
